a new beginning. or not.

everyone's getting hitched

Why is everyone getting married? OMG. My cousin's getting married. My friend's getting married early next year and apparently my other friend and my ex-bf are both getting married end of next year! My commitment phobic ex-bf. At least that's what he told me when we broke up. I sometimes wonder if there's a problem with me. People always seem to be unable to commit when in a relationship with me. Dun understand why. Maybe it's because I haven't found "the one".

When I was younger, I used to believe in the all so sacred - "THE ONE". I met my ex bf and I really thought he was the one, despite all his flaws. Just because I thought there was something more beneath the tough exterior. Because I thought we had the same goals in life. Well, I must have been really stupid and naive because he's definitely not "THE ONE". Like duh.

I seem to be always wrong anyways. Somehow the ppl I think that have something more beneath their tough exteriors dun actually have anything more. Maybe I'm a bad judge of character, maybe it's my own wishful thinking or maybe i was just PLAIN BLIND. I guess when emotions are involved, ppl just believe what they want to believes. It really takes an outsider to really see what's going on and wake you up from your incredulous dreams. That I thank my "outsiders" for it, for telling me the truth even when it stings.

Now, after growing much older and definitely wiser, I no longer believe in "THE ONE". I hope it's not a result of being jaded. I hope it is just me being a lot more realistic. I believe that "THE ONE" is just someone who will work on the relationship with you and never give up on you. But it's hard to find someone like that. A friend was telling me last night that she hopes to find someone who loves her the way she was. But I think that's insufficient. I think you need to find someone whom goals in life will coincide on the same path as yours and whom makes you the best you can be. And you need someone who as the same ideals about love as you do. Basically, you need to find someone who loves you the way you are, whose life goals coincide with yours, makes you the best you can be, who has the same ideals about love and whom will never give up on you on matter how hard the going gets. Am I too idealistic or are my standards too high? I have no idea. But I think everyone needs someone like that to spend their life with.

Honestly, I think to find someone like that is a practically a miracle. But it doesn't mean that anyone should compromise and settle for 2nd best. But it's difficult. I know it. Maybe impossible.

Keeping my fingers REAL crossed! ;p

posted by just me @ 11:41 AM